Lil’ Tucker goes off to war.

Attention, world: my country has been infested by woman-hating chickenhawks.
Read Sfc. Hester’s story here. She possesses the bravery of thirty ammosexuals.

“So we’ve got new hairstyles and maternity flight suits. Pregnant women are going to fight our wars. It’s a mockery of the U.S. military. While China’s military becomes more masculine as it has assembled the world’s largest navy, our military needs to become, as Joe Biden says, more feminine, whatever feminine means anymore.”
— Tucker Carlson’s statement on Tuesday, March 9th.

Before I go further, let me clarify a few things:

• I’m not a big guy, five-foot-six-inches tall. Also, I’m not very athletic. So my headline isn’t calling out Tucker Carlson for any type of physical limitation, but “Lil’ Tucker” seems to be a fitting name for a fella who is too lazy to join the military, yet thinks he can utter ignorant thoughts about servicemen and servicewomen because his Right-leaning political views enable him.

• Speaking of the military, I have never served in the military, just like Tucker Carlson and the viewers who think he represents a new standard for caucasian masculinity. While the modern GOP may come across as militant, they aren’t very military.

• I don’t possess an arsenal of military-style weapons, unlike the simps who supported Operation White Privilege on 1/6/21.

Now that I stated where I’m coming from, let me share a few facts about modern America and military service. The demographics aren’t as “Band of Brothers” as the American Right’s rhetoric makes them sound:

• In the Navy and Air Force, one in five service members are women.

• As the above article states: “Among enlisted recruits, 43 percent of men and 56 percent of women are Hispanic or a racial minority.”

• There are almost as many black women as white women in the Army. And keep in mind the black and white population percentages.

• Hispanics are the fastest-growing section of the military population.

• Non-hispanic white representation in the military is decreasing, not increasing.

As obtuse and clueless as Tucker sounds, his statement resonates in ways that would make Nazi propagandist Josef Goebbels proud. Tucker’s wannabe-soldier boasting finds an audience because his views mirror a modern conservative movement that got shaped by men like Dick Cheney, John Bolton, and Rush Limbaugh—men who supported the Vietnam War when they were young, but also dodged the draft. Angry hucksters like Tucker and Sean Hannity shaped their own views after idolizing Republicans who care more for the military-industrial complex than the actual military.

Whenever Tucker shoots off his mouth and riles up the white nationalists who love guns but lack the motivation to join the Army, Navy, Air Force, Marines, or Coast Guard, I think to myself, “Good job, tax-cheating rich guys: your plan to exploit racist and sexist tendencies in the simps you hate seems to be working.”

If you don’t live in America and are reading this post wondering when America’s civil war is gonna happen, please understand that my country’s conservative element does not serve in the military, despite what their rhetoric seems to suggest. They dig war movies, watching violent sports, bragging about their gun collections, and referring to themselves as “alpha males.”

Supremacist chickenhawks love thinking that their dead male relatives’ military service enables them to judge men and women currently on active duty—especially when the men and women on active duty are not white.

Supremacist chickenhawks who think that they are one decision away from joining America’s club of white male billionaires do not deserve a war.

Read Part II.
Previous posts about ammosexuals and their love for the tax-avoiding billionaires who hate them:
The 1% like ’em young, dumb, and full of shit.
There is civil war and there is “civil war.”
Bury Rush Limbaugh in Arlington. Own the libs.
How much chicken could a chickenhawk hawk if a chickenhawk could hawk chicken?
MAGA folks don’t really like cops. But they looooooove the idea of cops.

I write also write fiction. Check out my books at Amazon.

21 thoughts on “Lil’ Tucker goes off to war.

  1. This piece is a great example of just how off-putting left leaning rhetoric has become since the effects of post-modernism seizing complete control of our public school systems in the 90’s, started becoming noticeable.

    1. I get it, you wear Tucker Carlson pajamas. I’m a few years younger than that guy, I remember what the Reagan years did to fellas like him. It was like we masculinized the fella who picked fights, then ran to the teacher and played victim.

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